Never Forgoten. Happy 1st Birthday Evin.

I have been thinking long and hard on what or how to write this time. How can you put into words the feelings that you have when you realize that it has been a year since you said goodbye to the most precious thing in the world to you. But before this month was up, I wanted to write something in memory of my baby boy, Evin Gabriel.
I still think about him all the time. The more time goes by the clearer it becomes to me that his memory, the connection I feel to him, and the love I have, will never go away... and if anything they only get stronger! I find myself wondering what he would have looked like... been like. His eyes, the color of his hair, his smile and baby laughs. Even with another baby on the way, I do not miss him any less. The pain I feel can't be healed by anything but Heaven. I will always be looking in his brother's eyes for little pieces of him.
I came across this the other day: "Maybe its not sadness we are feeling... but love! There is no getting over love." Usually sadness is something you "get over" a feeling that fades away with time. But having to say goodbye to your baby is something you will never get over, and the feelings never go away. Love is so strong...not even time can heal. 
So as I think upon this past year the sadness and even the joys, I want to thank God for being my strength.  For giving me an amazing husband who has wiped my tears and been strong for me when I had no strength left. For wonderful friends that were always there for me, And for bringing new people into my life who really know how I was feeling and we could be there for each other.  (Im so sorry you had to know how I felt, but I could never thank God enough for you). 
My life will never be the same. But if this is how it had to be... I would not change it for the world! I love being Evin's Mom. He has shown me a love I never know existed! 


Always Loved, NEVER Forgotten, 
Your Mommy